Do your dreams come true?

A lot, maybe most, of mine haven't come true. And I am not complaining. But I have come close to a bunch of them. For months I would have been thinking of it, and for quite a while been even near it, so much so to have made it materialize. Sometimes I realized I had it right in front of me and sometimes I didn't. But to the point of my opening statement, I hadn't pursued any of them.

And yet there have been so many other times when opportunities had presented themselves to me and I had taken it. Simply. Naively and Sincerely. No expectations or dreams. Just doing a job. Doing it well and right. 

And by far they have been the best kind of truths that didn't really come out of dreams.

What do you value more - Time or what the time can give you?

As I do, I went to a nail salon recently. And asked for my usual. The girl who was servicing me was sincere and very good (which I shall realize later). I wanted my nails to be filed round - usually they ask if you want it shaped square or round. She filed one and showed me and argued that’s what was round. I couldn’t be bothered. I wanted it neat and easy. And then she went on to paint them taking her time perfecting it. Let me tell you it was beautiful to watch. No, not the nails or the color or the technique. It was her attentiveness and drive to do it right and to her best - I don’t even suppose it had anything to do with me :). But as it were, I had to finish and be somewhere so I was getting impatient. At one point I wanted to scream ‘I don’t want it to be perfect - just do a decent job and let me go!’

And then I stopped and knew I surprised myself in saying so. 

Where I earn my bread, I recall it being referred to as QTC - Quality Time Cost. Everyone wants the best at the cheapest cost ASAP (As soon as Possible).

We so often spend time looking for quality in everything, especially when we spend our hard earned money but when you get given it in some form you are stumped - for you discover an annoying fact about yourself - you value your time more than the steadfastness of what that time has to offer! Maybe its got something to do with mortality and the limited 'time' we all have got on this earth?

Restlessness is the mother of my words

My fingers have felt numb from wanting to pen it down

My head has been exploding from holding thoughts unto my own

I went through last few years neither living nor loving

For my eyes weren't seeing or looking

While the sky seemed bluer while i rose above

The bottom felt harder when I spiraled down

I created life but just about missed it within me

There may be words to explain what it all meant 

But to me I was alive and well

Always springing forward not knowing the nature of a spring was to snap back

Everything was a resting cane that made sure i never got my balance

Lucky for me I could see it before I reached the edge

Now, all i want is for things to be simple

And the joy to be from within

And the only way i know to get there is by this

My words found their way back in restlessness 

For that I thank what has been and move to what could be

What goes around comes around

It is an interesting thought, most commonly though used with a negative connotation, to remind you of the repercussions from your "bad" deeds. Let’s look at it this way, from a lifestyle aspect. It just says things get recycled, at least whatever can be.

'Fine Fettle' have these awesome snacks that are pure veg/fruits/nuts dried and flattened like crackers, that can be had with hummus or cheese or some such nutritious dip. And a single snack portion, a rather measly 6-8 pieces of 3cmx3cm, thin squares would cost you 3AUD (~approx 2 USD and 300+ INR).

Rewind 20 years. I used to hate going out in the hot sun to lay out some homemade flat chip-like-things to dry in the heat (I grew up in the southern part of India where there was only one season – Summer – hot and mild). They used to be made from various things from rice flour to bitter gourd to lentils - anything that can be crushed, dried and stored and later used as deep fried sides. That, if done now, would hardly cost anywhere near what Fine Fettle does. 

We used to be able to make things, although largely because of time-on-hand and lack of accessibility to readymade items like now, it did help save money. But the most unnoticed-then & coveted-now side effect was unadulterated, low-fat/low-carb/low-calorie, and most times nutritious options for meals and snacks.

We now spend more to eat lesser and lesser, and shell out even more to burn the little we ate - for the little we eat amounts to much more fat in our body now than earlier. 

Have you seen the runways recently? It’s all about lace my love. My fashion sense during my youth said lace was grandma-ish. Probably true then. And here again now, its "In". Same Difference. Its way more unaffordable than back then!

I can list quite a few like the above - Leopard print, cinched-at-waist silhouette, gathered churidhar bottoms, 'puff' sleeves, shoulder pads, marriage (yea!) ......

Back to recycling. So last 50-70 years has seen repackaging, commercialisation and trend-setting what was otherwise normal, everyday, home-made 'things'. Since our everyday is filled with ‘other’ exciting, stressful, meaningful goals.

And since I believe in the karma of circle, I'd wish to think it would go back to just where it started, in the next 100 years (maybe this time it'd be the men in their boxers, dhotis and veshtis home-making ;)).

But until then though, my friends, while we are alive, we are doomed to the Spending-Rut.

Wedding woes - Being one's own

Marriage is most beautiful (and tolerable) when you can be your own thoughts despite a surrender of sorts.
And thats the hardest to get to, though its about you, its the other that can make it happen, if at all.
While love and lust can ignite, its after all both the heads and hearts that step on it.

Rhaea: 8 years, Getting there... taking the ride, starting to love even the fuel stops, What say mr.R? :)

And did I mean the world to know - yes.
Did I not mean you to hear - no! It was a gesture, thought of as classically romantic. Else why would someone pop "Will you marry me" on a flying marquee up in the sky?! As if asking itself isnt stupid enough ;)

I am your mom, sunny!

So my almost-4-month old looks at me
thanks for the la-la tap-tap, hey silly woman
And I am like
I am no singer
I am no dancer
I am not a clown
I am your mom!
Of course I am all that and more
BECAUSE... I am your mom!

Non Entity is Unkown and Exists

He: Why are you comparing yourselves with another woman?
Rhaea: Well I am not, but I am guessing your expectations of a woman, and maybe another
He: I dont and cant think of another in your place
Rhaea: Had I not met you, then?
He: It is now a non-entity
Rhaea: But had you not met me, you would have met that non-entity?
He: Yes, so there is someone out there. That non-entity exists!
Rhaea: :)
Rhaea's Dad: Non-Entity is nothing but Unknown; When you know it, it is an Entity; 0 gets its meaning because of the existance of 1; 0 & 1 become relevant because of the presence of something beyond it - "2"!
Rhaea: Am I now "0", "1" or "2"!!!
He: (smiles)
Rhaea (thinks): Even Silence, Smile and Subtlety can be as good a statement, as a statement itself!